The Marriage

Milk of Mother to the Child (Raza'at)  |  Method of the Marriage  |  Dower (Maher) 
Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives

Allah says:-

               
(S4-A3)  Allah ordered the Muslims to marry the woman whome they liked two, three or upto
four. Thus if you fear that you will not be able to do justice among them then marry only one.

Important: Allah permitted to marry upto four women with the condition of doing justice among them. In case of fear of being not able to do justice, then He ordered to marry only one. Therefore the people who perform marriages with two, three or four women but do not maintain justice, they will find it difficult to explain their responsibility towards them before God.

The Creator of the universe has created pairs of all the creatures including mankind. Therefore as per orders of Allah.

            
(S36-A36)  Allah created in pairs all things that the earth produces, as well as, their own (human) kind and (other) things which they have no knowledge.

Hadees Shareef:

               
Hzt. Nabi Kareem Sal'am said “marriage is my Sunnah .
One who turns out from my Sunnah is not from me”.

Important: Anhazrat Sal'am said, the best of all things is a virtious woman. (Saheeh Muslim)

The couple is a blessing for each other, all the matters of their life are related to each other. Besides worldly affairs in religious matters and getting rewards of virtues (Sawab), they help each other. The lonely life of a man or woman in this world is not only dull and uninteresting but also disgraceful and source for commitment of sins.

In this world nobody is equal for a man or for a woman in expressing sympathy, confidence and comforting each other. If there is unity and love between a poor couple they will pass a heavenly life, happy and comfortable, in this world. No blessing is better than good and obedient offsprings. A childless king is considered to be a very unlucky person. Marriage is a Sunnat-e-Maukkada for both (the man and woman). For those who are having lustful feelings and are in fear of adultery, it (Marriage) is mandatory (Wajib). If there is no fear of adultery then it is a Sunnat-e-Maukkada. This is the verdict (Fatwah) of all the Muslim Jurists. It is a sin for lustful persons to give up this practice (Marriage). (Kanzul Daqaiq)

Marriage and divorce, mode of living and the rights and responsibilities of husband and wife on each other are described in detail in the Holy Quran in Soora Nisa, Soora Tallaq and also on various places. Besides, there are numerous traditions about this and the books on Islamic Jurisprudence (Fiq) are also contain details. By marrying one can save himself from adultery and looking towards other women and protects himself from sin.

Allah says:-

                                            
(S17-A32)  "And do not go near adultery, in deed it is a shameless deed and bad way".

The Prophet Sal'am said:-

                         
"Committing adultery once wastes the prayers offered for seventy years.It is also narrated in a
Tradition (Hadees Shareef) that looking at other women is a great sin (Gunah-e-Kabeerah) and
the forty days prayer of such person will be rejected".

Nikkah is performed through proposal and consent of the bride groom and the bride i.e. proposal by the groom and acceptance by the bride.

Nikkah is not permissible without witness. Therefore Hzt. Sal'am said.

No marraige without witness.          

Important: According to Imam Malik Rah. in respect of Nikkah the declaration is an essential condition and witness is not a necessary condition but in view of Imam Shafai Rah. marraige is not permissible without male muslim sane witnesses (Ghayatul Autar, Noorul Hadaya)

Marriage cannot be performed without guardian (Vali).
Thus the Tradition of the Prophet Sal'am says “No Nikkah without a guardian (Vali)”. The women with whom the Nikkah is not permissible are called confidente relative (Mahram).

Thus Allah Says:-

 
(S4-A23) "Prohibited are for you your mothers, daughters, sisters and sisters of your father and
the mother's sisters and the daughters of your brothers and sisters, those mothers who have
breast fed milk to you their daughters, your wive's mothers and daughters of your wives (with
other husband) with whom you have had intercourse and if you have not gone in then it is not a
sin and your won son's wives.

Allah further says:-

                                                             
(A4-S21)  Do not marry those women whom your fathers had married.

Also Allah says:-

                                                                
(S4-S21)  Marrying two sisters (at a time) is prohibited (Haram) for you.

Allah says:-

      
(S2-A221)  Do not marry polytheist (Mushrik) until they accept Islamic faith.
And slave girl who is having faith is better than a polytheist although it attracts you very much.
Do not marry polytheist untill they accept Islam.

Allah says:-

                               
"Your foster mothers (who have fed milk), foster sisters are (Haram) prohibited for you".

Hadith Shareef is :-

                                              
"Whichever is prohibited from the blood (race) (Salb) is also prohibited from foster relation.
This tradition is reported by Bukhary and Muslim through Hzt. Aisha Raz. In another tradition
in Muslim it is said that indeed whatever God prohibited in blood relation also prohibited in
foster relation". (Noorul Hadaya)

Mahram (confidante) are those ladies who are prohibited for Nikkah they are:-
Mother and grand mother and her mother, daughter, grand daughter and so on downward, sister, niece, aunt and those from foster relations owing to sucking milk are also prohibited. (Forbidden Haram) our mother in-laws are also prohibited. After sexual intercourse with wife, her daughter from previous husband (called Rabiba) is also prohibited and if intercourse is not commited, then her daughter is not prohibited. Therefore it is narrated from Abdullah Bin' Omru Bin Al'as. Anhazrat Sal'am said one who married a woman and enters into sexual relations with her, marrying her daughter is forbidden, if not is permissible and her mother is forbidden for him whether he commits sexual intercourse or not. (Noorul Hadaya)

Own son’s wife is also prohibited (Haram). Wife of adopted sons is not prohibited. Marrying two sisters at a time is (Haram) prohibited. If two sisters are slave girls, copulation with both of them is also prohibited. (Noorul Hadaya)

Marriage with polytheist woman is forbidden unless and until she embraces Islam.

Hzt. Nabi Kareem Sal'am said, do not gather with wife her aunt, her niece. It is narrated by many companions of the Prophet. The reason is that they had internal relationship and by performance of Nikkah the unity will cut off for often there is enemity, jealousy and ill feelings among the wives of one husband. Thus Anhazrat sal'am said,

      
Whenever you did it, you cut off their relations. (Noorul Hadaya)

Important: Nikkah with the woman who gets pregnant due to adultery, is permissible. The verdict (Fatwah) is for it. But according to Imam Abu Yousuf Rah. such marriage is void. This difference of opinion is in respect of the Nikkah with other person other than the one who has committed the adultery. If the person responsible for the pregnancy marries her it is permissible unanimously. In case of another person marrying such woman, then should abstain from sexual relations till the delivery. (Noorul Hadaya)

The woman with whom adultery is done or the woman whom a man touched with lust or saw her secret part lustfully whatever principles and relations she may have, the law of Hurmat (prohibition) will apply.

The woman who touched a man with lustful feeling or seen his penis amorously, whatever may be the principles and relations the law of Hurmat (prohibition) will apply. (Ghayatul Autar)

The prohibition (Hurmat) of touching and looking lustfully lasts till the discharge. And after touching or looking if the discharge takes place, prohibition will not exist for the reason that after contact of naked organs or lustfully gazing the desire for sexual intercourse increases. But after discharge there is no desire left at all. (Ghayatul Autar)

There is no difference in problems of touching and lust mentioned above being done intentionally, forcibly or by mistake, It will prove milk Prohibition (Hurmat-e-Masaherah). In these problems the teen aged youth about to reach puberty , mad person or the intoxicated one will also be treated like adult persons. (Ghayatul Autar)

Husband or wife wanted to wake up the other for sex but the hand of the husband touched his daughter or the hand of the woman touched the young son then the woman will be prohibited to him (for the husband) forever. (Ghayatul Autar)

Milk prohibition (Hurmat-e-Musaherat) will not break the Nikkah until divorce is given.
(Ghayatul Autar)

If some one touches his daughter with incestuous feelings or looks at her private part lustfully the mother of that girl will be prohibited for the father for ever. (Ghayatul Autar)

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Dower (Maher)  |   Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives

Method of the Marriage

From the side of the bride, as for as possible a confidante relation (Mahram) should be appointed as a viceregent (Vakeel) and from the bridegroom side two witnesses. The viceregent (vakeel) should take acceptance of the (Vali) guardian (or the bride) three times before two witnesses about the dower money settled upon for giving in marriage the bride to the groom. Then the viceregent and the witnesses should reach the marriage congregation and utter these wards before Khateeb (one who performs the ritual of Nikkah) in this way.

"I give miss................................................. D/o ........................................ in marriage of the bridegroom ........................................... S/o ........................................ in lieu of ................................. Mahr and I am the viceregent and these two persons stand witness for this. Both witnesses should say the following.

The viceregent (Vakil) has given in the Nikkah of ..................................S/o ..................... against the Mahr of ........................................ to Miss ...................... D/o.....................We both stand witness for this.

The above statement shall be repeated three time by the viceregent (Vakil) and the witnesses. Then the Kateeb should recite Kutba-e-Nikkah (Marriage Sermon).

Marriage Sermon Prepared by Miyan Alam Billah Rah

  
Greatest praise and glory are for Great Allah in Whose admiration these words occured in the
Holy Quran.

"God is graceful and loves grace." His blessing are exalted. His names are Holy He is the
ancient in existence and ever lasting His qualities are sung melodiously by the nightingale and
bright coloured doves in the gardens of Paradise. Allah says, Glory to Allah Who created in
pairs in all things that grow from earth as well as their (Human) and from those things which
they have no knowledge (Addressing the viceregent) on the terms of offer and acceptance
according to the Prophet, “performance of marriage is my practice (Sunnah) and one who
refused my tradition is not from me” in the presence of noble and respectable gathering it is
asked whether your viceregency (vikalat) is valid. The viceregent should say yes it is valid,
then (addressing the bride groom) say gentleman you are free capable of taking decision, wise
and matured and present in the gathering of the Muslims please tell whether you accept to
take Miss ..................... D/o ..................... in your Nikkah with a dower of ..................... and
four conditions according to Islamic law (Sunnah). The bridegroom should say ‘yes’ I accepted
her as my wife.

The four conditions as per Sharah (Islamic Law):-

(1) The first condition is that the woman should not be kept in want of food, clothes and necessary expenditure. Even if in need the out door activities like fetching water, fuel and shopping from the market etc. should be attended to by the groom himself and keep the wife in purdha and should never tease her.

(2) The second condition is that whenever the wife demands her dower, it should be paid to her without any excuse. If he does not have it, promise to pay it or get it forgiven, some how keep her satisfied.

(3) The third condition is that the husband should not take the wife beyond religious limits, should not take her without purdha and never stop her from going to her parents.

(4) The fourth condition is that if he not present himself (meet) her, while present (stay period) for six months. she shall have the right to take her own decision.

                                   
1. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Adam (AS) and Eve (AS)

                      
2. O, Lord create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Ibrahim (AS) and Hajira (AS)

                     
3. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Ayub (AS) and Rahima (AS)

                          
4. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Yousuf (AS) and Zulekha (AS)

                         
5. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Musa (AS) and Safura (AS)

                      
6. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Sulaiman (AS) and Bilquis (AS)

                   
7. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Mohammad-ur-Rasool Allah (PBUH) and Bibi Aisha Raz.

 
8. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Ali Murtuza Raz and Fatima Raz.

       
9. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
   Mohammad ainil Mahdi-Al-Maood (PBUH) and Bibi Alhadadi Raz.

           
10. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
     Syed Mahmood Sani-e-Mahdi Raz and Bibi Kad Banu Raz.

     
11. O, God create love between the couple just as Thou hast created love between
     Syed Khundmir Siddiq-e-Villayat Syed-us-Shohda Raz and Bibi Fatima Raz.

By orders of Allah and revelation of the Holy Quran where in Allah says.

  
after this asks the vakil whether his vikalat is valid. The vakil says ‘yes’ it is valid. Then he says that in exchange for the dower of (........................) the half of it is ( ) gave Miss...................................................D/o ...................................... in the Nikkah of ........................................................ S/o ...................................... with four Islamic conditions. The vakil replies in affirmative. After this he asks the bridegroom to tell whether he accepted Miss .................................. D/o ................................... in lieu of ..................... Dowar (Mahr) with the four conditions. The groom says ‘yes’ he desired and accepted. This is to be repeated 3 times. Then the four islamic conditions are pronounced). After these formalities are over,

the said dua is recited. (1-11) (Allah Huma, see page No.193 & 194 ——)

On the wedding occasion, the best method of expression of these conditions is in vogue from the olden times. The expression of the conditions at the time of marriage is preferable because most of the bridegrooms are unaware of them and it is essential to know at the time of wedding. The said conditions are sharai and are found in books of Islamic laws (Fiq). Thus in Noorul Hadaya part two, chapter “Anyan” it is mentioned about the fourth condition that it is narrated by Imam Mohammed Bin Hasan from Abu Haneefa Rah. and he from Ismail Bin Aslam Makki he from Hussain that a woman came to Hzt. 'Umer Bin Al-Khitab Raz. and complained that her husband did not come to her, then he fixed one year for him, one year passed and he did not reach her. So he (Hzt. 'Umer Raz.) permitted the woman and she did according to her self desire. The whole chapter deals with it. In Darul Qaza (department of Islamic Justice) there are numerous such instances where on the complaints of the wives, the court after due verification about the husbands, issued orders of separation as per Islamic laws of justice.

It is clarified that the decendents of Hzt. Mahdi-e-Mauood Alaihissalm's dower (Mahr) is eleven (11) Auqia and in the family of Hzt Syed Khundmeer Raz. Sayyadush Shuhuda the dower is ten (10) Auqia and all the other Musaddequeen (Mahdavies) nine (9) Auqia dower is traditional.

The advantage is that the amount of dower is very small and within reach of the bridegroom. Wherever the dower is not so fixed, it is seen that at the time of the marriage there are great differences for settlement of dower (Mahr) In some cases the marriages are cancelled and at the time of demanding dower, they have to face a lot of difficulties. But in groohe-e-Muqaddus (sacred group of the Mehdavis) because of the fixed dower, and on account of keeping in practice, there shall be no quarrel at all in this matter.

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Dower (Maher)  |   Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives

Order Regarding Dower (Maher)

Allah says:-

                      
(S4-A24) "in the way you benefitted dower from these women, pay them (the Mahr) settled
upon."

The dower (Maher) is of two kinds viz Mahr Misl and Mahr Musamma. Mahr Misl is one which is equal to the Maher of another equivalent women. Equivalent women means those women who are related to the bride from father side such as sisters, paternal aunts etc.

Maher Musamma is one that is fixed. Whatever Maher it may be i.e. Misl or Musamma it is paid in two ways. 1) Mo’ajjal and 2) Movajjal.

MAHR MO’AJJAL is one which should be paid whenever it is demanded. And MAHR MOVAJJAL is one which should be paid compulsorily after the death. (Ghayatul Autar)

It is a fact that a woman can forgive her dower (Mahr) whether husband accepts it or not. Even after the death of the husband or after the Talaq-e-Bayan i.e. Distinct divorce if the wife forgive, the dower, it will be considered as forgiven. But the condition is that the wife shall not do so on her death bed. Due to divorce Movajjal Dower turns into Mahr Mo’ajjal and even after remarriage (Raj’at) it will not become Movajjal. (Ghayatul Autar)

Marriage without mentioning dower is permissible. (Ahsanil Masail)

The woman has the right to prevent the husband from sexual pleasure and also from taking her to another city till the dower is paid to her though he has had sex with her earlier.

The following Table will Show the Quantity in Tolas and Price
and the Total Amount of Dower

T=Tola     M=Masa      R=Rati     Rs=Rupees      A=Ana     P=Pai

It is written in Hadaya and Durr-e-Mukhtar that the Sharai Auquia is equivalent to 40 Dirham and dirham-e-sharai is equivalent to 14 qirat and qirat is equal to 5 grains of jav. Thus one Dirham-e-Sharai is equal to 70 grains of jav and one grain of jav is 1/3 of a rati i.e. 3 grain of jav will make one rati. This way 24 grain of jav will be equal to one masa. A dirham sharai is equal to 2 masa and 7½ rati. And 40 dirham sharai one auquia which is equal to 9 tolas 8 masas and 5½ rati. The price of pure gold is often Rs. 30/- per tola and accordingly to the above account is shown. When ever it is needed, the price can be adjusted to current price.

Home  |  Top   |  Milk of Mother to the Child (Raza'at)   |  Method of the Marriage 
Dower (Maher)  |   Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives

Orders about Milk of Mother to the Child (Raza'at)

Allah says:-

  
(S2-A233) And mothers should give suck to their children for two complete years.
This period is ment for one who wants to complete infancy period of the child.

                                            
(S46-A15) And kept him in her womb affectionately and in pain delivered him and
the period for discontinueing the milk is 30 months.

The period of sucking milk according to Imam Azam Rah. is two years six months and with others sahaba is two years. (Noorul Hadaya, Ghayatul Autar)

After feeding milk, though the quantity of milk may be very little and milk has gone into stomach through mouth or nose, the relation of foster mother is confirmed. (Ghayatul Autar).

If a child has sucked milk of many women of a village and at the time of his marriage, it seems difficult to find out which of them had breast fed milk to him and there is no witness for it, in this condition marriage will not be permissible to him with any of the women of that village. (Ghayatul Autar)

Woman should not breast feed milk to any child without the permission of husband unless there is fear of the death of the child, if the milk is not made available. In such event she must remember it or note it down. (Ghayatul Autar)

A wise man should not engage a mad woman to breast feed his child. (Ghayatul Autar)

The prohibition for marriage occuring according to the genealogy relation will also apply to relations of foster mother. However in some cases it may not be so far example. The foster mother of a child will be legally permissible for the grand father of the child. (Ghayatul Autar)

The two foster children of a woman are prohibitted (Haram) for each other though their period of sucking milk is different and her husbands are also different persons. (Ghayatul Autar)

Home  |  Top   |  Milk of Mother to the Child (Raza'at)   |  Method of the Marriage 
Dower (Maher)  |   Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives

Real privacy is the isolation of the male and the female without any inhibition or impediment for sex. The circumstances of impediment for privacy are; sensational disease that causes obstruction to copulation. Sharai obstructions i.e. Ramazan fast, physical obstructions such as menses etc, presence of third person. Even if the third person is found sleeping or blind it will be considered as obstruction in the privacy. But the infant who has no wisdom or the slave girl of any of the couple is not an obstruction. (Ghayatul Autar)

Non suitablity of place such as mosque or forest is also an obstruction. (Ghayatul Autar)

If the husband does not recognize his wife then it is also an obstruction as per Islamic law, for without recognizing the wife the authority for copulation is impossible. Observing missed fast, offerings expiation fast and nafil fast are not obstructions in real sense. (Ghayatul Autar)

Equality Among the Wives

It is essential for a man to maintain equality and justice among his wives in the matters such as spending nights with them, providing food, clothes and expressing affection with them whether a wife was a virgini or a remarried women. Muslim or the woman of Book (the women who are the followers of the holy Books such as Christian or Jew). But in respect of love the equality is not a necessary condition. (Ghayatul Autar)

The right of a woman according to law is fulfilled if the husband makes love with her once. But honestly speaking, it is necessary for a man to copulate often to satisfy her. If a man stays with a wife for one month without making a journey and the other wife quarrels and demands justice, the husband will be ordered to maintain equality in future. The past may not be compensated because the fulfilment of demand can be made only after the demand. (Ghayatul Autar)

If the husband is going on journey, he has a right to choose any one of his wives, because in order to be practicable there can't be fixed turn during the journey. But it is desirable (Mustahab) to select one by lottery systems. (Ghayatul Autar)

A man who has a few wives should not copulate one wife excepting her turn nor stay there except with permission of other wives. The duration between one turn and the other turn should not exceed seven days. (Ghayatul Autar)

It is permissible for a man to prohibit his wife from eating or drinking food the smell of which is disliked by him. (Ghayatul Autar)

Other Problems

A woman's going out of the house unnecessarily is not permissible, but in necessity she can go out. (Ghayatul Autar)

It is permissible for a woman to see relatives without permission of the husband provided she has not been paid the dower.(Mahr) If she has been paid the dower then she should not go out without permission of the husband. If the wife is indebted to a man or some man is indebted to a woman then she may go out without permission. (Ghayatul Autar)

Home  |  Top   |  Milk of Mother to the Child (Raza'at)  |  Method of the Marriage  
Dower (Maher)  |  Real Privacy of the Couple (Khilwat-e-Sahiah)  |  Equality Among the Wives